The One Thing Every Wife Should Know

This morning my husband shared a blog post/article with me. It took me all day to read it. I had so many interruptions that continued to demand my time and attention. The post is titled, “The Most Important Thing a Wife Might Not Know About Her Husband”. It is written by a long time blogger, Kimberly Suchta.

She wrote about a conversation she had with her  husband. After some pondering, he replied,

“the biggest thing a wife might not realize about her husband, is how important it is for him that she encourages herself in the gospel. Because the only way she can love her husband well is if she’s believing how much Christ loves her.”

Well, today was a whopper of a day to learn this.

I’ve known for some time that it is so important to put God first in all things. Especially in marriage. Naturally, that’s much easier said than done. When I have someone  in the present, whom I can touch and feel. Who will hug me and love me. Well, it is a lot easier to begin relying on and depending on my husband more than my God.

I know, I know…shame on you for saying that – you churched woman, you.

BUT here me out.

We’ve all done it. Whether we admit it or not, this is natural. When someone is genuinely and warmly hugged for two minutes, it’s been scientifically proven that the body relieves a great amount of stress. It’s so much more understandable and accessible to rely on someone who we can see and feel than to talk to God who is unseen and unfelt by the skin.

So. Here we are. Circling back to the most important thing a wife might not know about her husband. 

It is paramount to him that she encourage herself in the gospel.

Knowing what it means to be Christian, a daughter of God, Loved by the Lord, and all the many wonderful things we are as women. To know how much the Lord truly loves us and fills our life with grace. Not lawful expectation.

Now I know everything I need can be found in my relationship with Christ. This frees up my relationship with my husband to be healthy. I’m not putting him under some crazy unrealistic expectations.

It frees us to be us.

As mentioned earlier, today was a crazy day. I had to deal stressing over things that were way out of my realm of control. The frustration kept building and I became absolutely unravelled.  Then again – there’s trusting in my Lord to direct me even when I think I understand it all. He really, REALLY knows best for us all. 

No one else was around. I couldn’t get any emotional support from my noisy barking dogs, and there was me. In the house. I had no option but to run to Christ. He reminded me that He’s with me – always. Even though stuff doesn’t make sense, He’s leading us all. And we all have to keep going no matter how much we don’t understand. So is life.

I trust the Lord and know that He is my Father. He has the best plan for us. So, when my husband returns home from a busy day at work, I can focus on just being with him. I don't resort to expecting him to make me feel better or find peace.

My peace comes from God – and it’s horribly unfair for me to expect that peace to come from my husband.

When I am seeking after the Lord, looking for Him in all situations, my Husband knows it.

He sees the confidence and peace in me that can only be because of the Holy Spirit. And that’s what grows a healthy marriage. Zero codependency on one another and instead sole dependency on God.

What’s the one thing every wife should know?

It’s incredibly important to my husband that I pursue my relationship with God. That matters so much more to him than I could know and affects every part of our marriage.

If you’re interested in reading about the 5 Things a Husband Might Not Know About His Wife, read Kimberly Suchta’s post here.